Forced sex fantasies for women

A study in found 62 per cent of the women participating had sexual fantasies in which they are forced into having sex against their will. These statistics can make for uncomfortable reading, particularly in the wake of the Me Too movement and the numerous sexual assault scandals that have dominated recent headlines. But, in order to understand ourselves, we must go to where it is uncomfortable. Why are some women regularly fantasising about being forced into having sex? Rape by its very definition is non-consensual, while a sexual fantasy, no matter how violent it may be, is always under the direction and control of the person having it.
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09.07.2020
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Rape fantasy

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Why some women fantasise about forceful sex, and why that’s nothing to be ashamed of

But the research suggests that up to 62 per cent of women experience fantasies about some sort of non-consensual sexual encounter at least once in their lives, 14 per cent of them have these fantasies at least weekly, and 9 to 14 per cent consider them their most frequent or favourite fantasies. Justin Lehmiller is an American social psychologist and sex researcher who has studied these fantasies, most recently for his book Tell Me What You Want But, though common, such fantasies can be uncomfortable for those who experience them, and cultural critics perpetuate that feeling. Some say that the fantasies are a protective mechanism for women taught to believe that they should not have sexual urges. She stresses that she is a part of the movement, but argues that elements of its cultural narrative can contribute to the pathologisation of forced-sex fantasies. So how can the many women who experience rape fantasies, but reject rape culture, reconcile their erogeny and ideology, especially in an era of heightened cultural scrutiny? T his is an especially difficult task, given that academics and cultural critics have offered many different possible explanations for rape fantasies — some of them pathologising, and some of them not — but few have backed their ideas with evidence.
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Why some women fantasise about forceful sex, and why that’s nothing to be ashamed of

A rape fantasy sometimes referred to as rapeplay or a ravishment is a sexual fantasy involving imagining or pretending being coerced or coercing another into sexual activity. In sexual roleplay , it involves acting out roles of coercive sex. Rape pornography is literature or images associated with rape and sometimes Stockholm syndrome as a means of sexual arousal. Studies have found rape fantasy is a common sexual fantasy among both men and women.
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But this common fantasy is one that few of us feel comfortable sharing. It puts people on edge and makes us feel a bit wrong. In real-life contexts, rape — meaning sex against your will — is deeply traumatising. Content warning: Those who find discussions of rape and sexual assault may find this article triggering.
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